Specific dates stay with us forever, sometimes for the best possible reasons and other times because our worst nightmares come to life.
A dad shared how he chose to skip his older daughter’s wedding because of the date.
The day his baby died
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 2 453ddd](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/453ddd.jpg)
The father shared, “The wedding was on March 25, which coincides with my other daughter’s birthday. She was born on March 25, 2022. She was barely three months when she passed away.”
The family wanted to mark the date
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 3 crying w](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/crying-w.jpg)
The wife, who is not the bride’s mother, wanted to “celebrate our daughter’s life on the date of her birth.” The dad also did not feel it would be appropriate to have a family festivity and leave his wife behind. He added they were both still grieving.
The date was significant for the oldest daughter
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 4 laugh 1200x675 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/laugh-1200x675-1.jpg)
Father shared that “March 25 is significant to her relationship, and that’s why she chose it, but it just wasn’t feasible for me.” Even before the bride set the date, father told her, “I’m doubtful I’d be there if she chose this date.”
Dad’s guilt
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 5 hjh](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/hjh.jpg)
Obviously, the father felt guilty “about missing my eldest daughter’s special day.” That’s why he turned to Reddit’s AITA and shared his heartfelt message.
The bride’s mom did not help
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 6 hs5n 675x1200 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/hs5n-675x1200-1.jpg)
The man added that his ex-wife, the oldest daughter’s mom, and her family sent a bunch of hateful messages.
There is an argument on both sides
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 7 ud3n3n 675x1200 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/ud3n3n-675x1200-1.jpg)
One highlighted post wrote, “You needed to support your living daughter – she needed you there. I’m sorry if that sounds cold, but this was such a big event, and I’m sure she dreamed of you being a part of it.”
But, another side was just as valid
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 8 u233n 675x1200 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/u233n-675x1200-1.jpg)
A highlighted reply said, “You are not putting one child over the other. You are surviving. It is unfortunate that it was the same date, but if she needed you there, she could have moved it.”
Dad also felt his daughter did not consider his feelings
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 9 udn3n 675x1200 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/udn3n-675x1200-1.jpg)
In response, the original poster shared, “I’m of the mind that if she had truly needed me there, she had 364 other dates she could have chosen from where I would have been available.”
Others agreed that the bride did not think about the date
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 10 unhappy couple](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/unhappy-couple.jpg)
As another person wrote, “If she wanted her father at her wedding, she would have chosen a different date. She wanted him to choose, which is beyond cruel in and of itself.”
Many attacked the oldest daughter
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 11 outraged woman 1200x675 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/outraged-woman-1200x675-1.jpg)
One Reddit user shared, “How about the living daughter supporting her father by choosing a different date of her half-sister’s death? I can believe she could be so insensitive.”
Others thought the daughter chose the date on purpose
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 12 corporate man 1200x675 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/corporate-man-1200x675-1.jpg)
Another Reddit poster wrote, “I think she specifically chose the date knowing that OP would be unable to attend, and it would be an additional thing to resent.”
They added the daughter always wanted Grandpa to take her down the aisle. It should be noted that the oldest daughter never met the original poster’s wife.
Many shared their grief
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 13 pregnant couple 1200x675 1](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/pregnant-couple-1200x675-1.jpg)
Some Reddit users who lost children gave the most heartfelt answers. However, one person who lost a child was on the bride’s side. They wrote, “As someone who lost my baby only a few months ago, I can certainly appreciate OP’s grief and the significance of the 1st anniversary of the child’s birth.”
Yet, they added, “I do think you will likely regret not being there for your living daughter.”
The date was significant for the newlyweds
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 14 236gde](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/236gde.jpg)
As much as people wanted to label the daughter as “toxic,” the original poster shared that she met her now husband on that date. While it could have been pushed for at least a few days, the date was not random for the couple.
NTA
![Dad Warned His Daughter Not to Plan Her Wedding on the First Anniversary of His Baby’s Death, But She Ignored Him, So He Didn’t Go 15 hg765](https://buzzloving.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/hg765.jpg)
On Reddit, the father was labeled as NTA (Not Wrong). What do you think about this situation? Perhaps no one was in the wrong, and everyone did what they felt like doing.
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Source: Reddit